I have been wanting to write about this topic for some time now. It has been a topic that has been simmering away and although I knew in a sense what to say, I also knew I needed to wait for the right timing.
As Christians we should know the scripture which speaks of Christians only marrying Christians; of the need to be equally yoked with the other person to whom one is to be united with. I have read quite extensively on this topic, and heard many different views, and this post is my stance...My stance as a single, Christian woman.
As a mature single woman, I have the liberty of meeting and getting to know many different men in the context of friendship and work. Please know I write this post, as I do all my others, from a place of genuine Christian love.
I believe that if we are truly a born-again, single Christian, we would not choose to be bound to someone who is not.
A born-again Christian has been made new. They've become a Child of The Living God.
We are not born Children of God. Because of The Fall, we are actually born under sin, and therefore a child of the devil.
When we repent and choose Jesus, we become Children of God. We become united with God. Through Jesus, the Holy Spirit lives in us! How could we then unite ourselves with the dark?
I want to make it clear, if someone becomes a Christian after already marrying a non-Christian, they are to remain married to that person!! You see, at the end of the day our life is NOT our own...We've been bought with a price and we are not to be self-serving, we are to serve Jesus...
I believe Jesus says to us, “Do you love me?” Just like He asked Peter, “Do you love me?...Feed my sheep.”
If the non-believer chooses to stay close to the light in us, then we rejoice and pray for them...But if they choose to run from the light, we are no longer bound to them, for God has called us to peace as His children.
As God's children we are called to a life of peace...peace even in the difficult times...for peace does not mean a life without persecution.
Peace for a marriage is being united in Christ. Peace in a marriage is unity in prayer, theology, morals, raising children...If we decide to date a non-Christian for the possibility of marriage, we need to ask ourselves a challenging question.
Do they see Christ in me?
Jesus said that if the world hated Him, it will hate those who belong to Him. Now hate can simply be rejection. The rejection of us because of Christ in us.
So, if a non-Christian is willing to date and possibly marry you, have they really seen Christ in you? Have they heard your testimony? Have you prayed with them? Are you able to talk about Jesus freely with them without a poor reaction? For if they have seen Christ in you they will respond...their response will either be choosing Jesus and staying with you, or rejecting Jesus and therefore also rejecting that integral part of you.
I have read comments like, “But we get along so well.” “He's nicer than the men at church.” Now I truly actually understand...I know some really nice non-Christian men, and I also know some not-so-friendly Christian men. Personally I don't think I'm equally yoked with either. Being equally yoked is more than the other person claiming Christianity or being a Christian. I can hear Jesus ask me...
"Do you love me?"
"Do you love me?"
Do I love Him enough to put Him first, and trust His plan for me?
It's like when God asked to the Jews to trust Him, and not go down to Egypt when the invasion came...To not fear, but trust and obey. Sadly, they did not trust and obey, and therefore suffered the consequences.
It's like when Mary responded, “May it happen to me according to your word”, even though she could have been stoned to death for becoming pregnant out of wedlock.
It's like when Jesus prayed in the garden, “Father, take this cup of suffering away, but not my will be done, but Yours.” God's will was done.
God's plan for us is not easy!
Jesus does not save us so we can simply go to heaven.
The Gospel is NOT Jesus + Plus the lifestyle you choose = Salvation.
The Gospel is Jesus saves us to become the Children of God for eternity, when we die to ourselves as god, and let Him be God over us. He saves us by re-birthing us to become His hands and feet NOW while we await His return.
Jesus asks, “Do you love me?”
My heart's cry is, let it be, “Yes!”
“Enter through the narrow gate for wide is the gate and broad the way leading to destruction, and many are those entering through.” Matthew 7:13.
If we truly love Jesus, how can we keep this love silent?
I know what it is like to feel lonely at times, and wonder if there is an equal Christian upon the horizon...But I also know what it's like to be married to a non-Christian, and I choose God's peace.
It is His peace that helps me bear the weight and privilege of bearing His Name. It is His grace, love, peace and joy that keeps me strong when temptations come. I want to be found faithful when He comes. I want to hear the words, “Well done, you loved me MORE than the world.”
If I am convicted of anything in this life, may it be that of being a born-again Christian. May I leave a legacy that is the testimony of the love and power of Jesus to transform us into the Children of God.
Are we willing to pray for the strength to endure?
When Jesus asks, “Do you love me?” are we willing to answer, “Yes, and therefore I only want your will!”
In His love, Melanie.